don’t dare start thinking in the morning … if I thought thoughts would bust my head
Blues at Dawn
I don’t dare start thinking in the morning. I don’t dare start thinking in the morning. If I thought thoughts in bed, Them thoughts would bust my head – So I don’t dare start thinking in the morning.
I don’t dare remember in the morning Don’t dare remember in the morning. If I recall the day before, I wouldn’t get up no more – So I don’t dare remember in the morning.
As published in The Collected poems of Langston Hughes by Langston Hughes (New York: Knopf, 1994).
I don’t dare start thinking in the morning.
I don’t dare remember in the morning
If I thought thoughts in bed, them thoughts would bust my head.
If I recall the day before, I wouldn’t get up no more.
Just get me a cup of coffee and go away for about 20 minutes.
everywhere nowhere jactatively away like the falling tide
Adapted from the poem, Words in a Certain Appropriate Mode” by Hayden Carruth as published in Collected Shorter Poems, 1946–1991 (Copper Canyon Press: Port Townsend, Wash, 1992).
Aside from the many moods captured in the poem that match many of my current moods,
Nor not alone, where cognition seeps Jactatively away like the falling tide
If there were a tide, and what is left Is nothing, or is the everything that keeps Its undifferentiated unreality, all
It was that word there, Jactatively.
Was it made up?
Is it really a word?
Was gratified to find it is indeed a word.
And what a word!
According to the Online Merriam-Webster, Jactatively is an adverb derived from the rare word jactative (pertaining to boasting or the restless tossing of the body), meaning in a manner characterized by bragging, ostentatious false claims, or restless physical agitation.
In the 17th century, lawyers began tossing around the word jactitation, which can be traced back to the Latin verb jactare, meaning “to throw.” Originally, jactitation was used as a word for a false claim or assertion being publicly thrown about to the detriment of another person. Run-of-the-mill slander and false claims of being married to someone were two common types of jactitation brought to court. Before long, jactitation had jumped over to the medical profession, where it continues to serve as a word for restless, jerky, or twitchy body movements. In 1761, British writer Laurence Sterne threw jactitation into his novel Tristram Shandy as a substitute for discussion, but that meaning never caught on.
Restless physical agitation.
BOY HOWDY!
All I have to do is turn off the light and lay down yet my mind jactatively refuses to release me to sleep.
Here is the poem.
It is not music, though one has tried music. It is not nature, though one has tried The rose, the bluebird, and the bear. It is not death, though one has often died.
None of these things is there.
In the everywhere that is nowhere Neither the inside nor the outside Neither east nor west nor down nor up Where the loving smile vanishes, vanishes In the evanescence from a coffee cup Where the song crumbles in monotone Neither harmonious nor inharmonious Where one is neither alone Nor not alone, where cognition seeps Jactatively away like the falling tide If there were a tide, and what is left Is nothing, or is the everything that keeps Its undifferentiated unreality, all Being neither given nor bereft Where there is neither breath nor air The place without locality, the locality
With neither extension nor intention But there in the weightless fall Between all opposites to the ground That is not a ground, surrounding All unities, without grief, without care Without leaf or star or water or stone Without light, without sound anywhere, anywhere . . .
pursuit of money renders no longer worthy of citizenship
Adapted from the book, The Bully Pulpit : Theodore Roosevelt, William Howard Taft, and the Golden Age of journalism by Doris Kearns Goodwin (Simon & Schuster: New York, 2013), where Ms. Kearns writes about the impact of Ida Tarbell’s profile of John D. Rockefeller serialized in nineteen articles that ran from November 1902 to 1904.
Ms. Kearns wrote:
As her narrative progresses, Tarbell’s indignation at Rockefeller seems to grow, and her language sometimes slips into the same metaphors for soulless mechanical power that cheapened White’s portrait of Boss Platt.
She describes his eyes “as expressionless as a wall,” notes the “downward” droop of “his mouth,” his “cruelest” and “most pathetic” feature, and the repellent puffiness of his cheeks.
More than a touch of personal vindictiveness colors her representation of Rockefeller as she describes how his pursuit of money renders him no longer “a human man” but rather “a machine — a money machine — stripped by his overwhelming passion of greed of every quality which makes a man worthy of citizenship.”
According to Wikipedia: Magazine historian Frank Luther Mott called it, “one of the greatest serials ever to appear in an American magazine.” It would contribute to the dissolution of Standard Oil as a monopoly and lead to the Clayton Antitrust Act. Tarbell concluded the series with a two-part character study of Rockefeller, perhaps the first CEO profile ever, though she never met or even talked to him. Rockefeller called Tarbell, “Miss Tarbarrel”.
We talk a lot about citizenship today.
We talk a lot about what qualifies a person for citizenship today.
We talk a lot about who qualifies as a citizenship today.
I put it to you readers that the pursuit of money renders anyone no longer “a human” but rather “a machine — a money machine — stripped by their overwhelming passion of greed of every quality which makes anyone worthy of citizenship.”
As an exercise, I asked AI, which is as numb to feelings as numb can get, what are qualities which makes anyone worthy of citizenship?
AI responded: put the emphasis on character and conduct rather than wealth, education, religion, or political affiliation.
AI then said, some of the strongest qualities are:
Respect for others – Recognizing that fellow citizens have the same basic rights and dignity, even when you disagree with them.
Respect for the rule of law – Accepting that laws apply to everyone, including those with whom you agree and those with whom you strongly disagree.
Personal responsibility – Taking responsibility for your own actions rather than constantly blaming others.
Honesty and integrity – Telling the truth, keeping commitments, and acting ethically when nobody is watching.
Civic responsibility – Voting, staying informed, serving on juries when called, paying taxes, and contributing to the functioning of society.
Tolerance – Understanding that a free society necessarily contains people with different beliefs, cultures, religions, lifestyles, and political opinions.
A willingness to contribute – Contributing to the community through work, service, volunteering, raising a family, creating businesses, teaching, helping neighbors, or other productive activity.
Respect for freedom – Valuing your own freedoms while recognizing that other citizens possess those same freedoms.
Courage – Being willing to stand up for what is right, including defending the rights of people with whom you disagree.
A sense of community – Understanding that citizenship isn’t simply “What does my country give me?” but also “What do I owe the people with whom I share this country?”
Willingness to learn – Being open to evidence and changing one’s mind when facts demonstrate that one is wrong.
Commitment to the country – Not necessarily blind patriotism, but a genuine desire for the country and its people to prosper.
Easy to dismiss as AI but lets go back to that sentence, stripped by their overwhelming passion of greed of every quality which makes anyone worthy of citizenship.
Now imagine some of the folks I have in mind and take these 12 points as a check list and review them one by one against these folks and answer yes or no for that person.
I get 12 for 12 in the no column.
Stripped by their overwhelming passion of greed of every quality which makes anyone worthy of citizenship.
sweet love remembered such wealth brings that I scorn to change my state with kings
When, in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes, I all alone beweep my outcast state,
And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries, And look upon myself and curse my fate, Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featured like him, like him with friends possessed, Desiring this man’s art and that man’s scope
With what I most enjoy contented least;
Yet … in these thoughts myself almost despising …
Haply … I think on thee,
and then my state,
(Like to the lark at break of day arising from sullen earth)
sings hymns at heaven’s gate;
For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings That then I scorn to change my state with kings.
Sonnet 29 by William Shakespeare (1609).
I know that a sonnet is having 14 lines of iambic pentameter ending in a rhymed couplet and the recitation of such should follow the rhythm of the scan but when I am already editing Mr. Shakespeare down to a haiku, how much more of an offense can it be to try and add parsing in my own fashion (which I stole from a YouTube recitation of the Sonnet 29 by Judi Dench (which I will leave to you to look up on your own)).
BUT I Digress as the point of this is to say in words better than I can write, Happy Anniversary, to my wife!
1989 to 2026, for some better and lots worse, and still together … after all these years!
For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings … That then I scorn to change my state with kings.
mercy’s quality not strain’d – droppeth gentle as the rain from heaven
The quality of mercy is not strain’d.
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven upon the place beneath.
It is twice blest:
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
‘Tis mightiest in the mightiest;
it becomes the thronèd monarch better than his crown.
His sceptre shows the force of temporal power,
The attribute to awe and majesty wherein doth sit the dread and fear of kings;
But mercy is above this sceptered sway.
It is enthronèd in the hearts of kings …
The Merchant of Venice (act 4, scene 1) by William Shakespeare.
I enjoy the fact that some things have not changed since Big Bill’s time on earth.
Even today …
The quality of mercy is not strain’d. It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven Upon the place beneath.
It is twice blest: It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
Yet even more.
That the quality of mercy still is to be marveled at as well as embraced, no one has said it any better than Big Bill did 500 years ago.
But mercy is above this sceptered sway.
This passage has been much on my mind of late.
Much on mind due to an avalanche of mercies that has embraced me and my family
Did I tell you about …?
Did I mention that …?
Then this happened …
Then that …
I would be a poor player to not acknowledge these mercies that dropped on us as the gentle rain from Heaven.
And that it is twice blest if not more for sure it blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
But also those who just hear about it.
I do not question this good fortune and it some cases, it’s just band aids and in some cases, it’s just an indication of band aids that might yet to come.
Still.
I have quoted this before.
In the 1st chronological book in the Hornblower series by CS Forester, Mr. Midshipman Hornblower, Mr. Forester has young Hornblower standing before three Captains who are examining him on his knowledge of seamanship before passing on his promotion to Lieutenant.
The three Captains present young Hornblower with an impossible situation and ask, as the man in charge, what would he do?
While Hornblower stammers out a reply, the Captains add even more impossible situations to the question.
All seems lost when the examination is interrupted by the sound of cannon shot and everyone races out of the room to deal with an emergency.
Afterwards Hornblower is told the exams are over for the time being with no decision on his case.
Young Hornblower is dejected and one of the Captain’s, Captain Foster addresses him.
‘Now lookee here, Mr Hornblower said Foster, turning upon him.
‘To the best of my recollection, you were flat aback, about to lose your spars and with Dover cliffs under your lee.
In one more minute you would have been failed – it was the warning gun that saved you.
Is not that so ?
… Then be thankful for small mercies. And even more thankful for big ones.
