moment you’re suspended knowing nothing and no one … not even yourself
There are a few times in life when you leap up and the past that you’d been standing on falls away behind you,
and the future you mean to land on is not yet in place,
and for a moment you’re suspended, knowing nothing and no one, not even yourself.
From The Dutch House by Ann Patchett (Harper Perennial: New York, 2021).
Time marches on.
As Willie Wonka said, “Oh, you can’t get out backwards. You’ve gotta go forwards to go back. Better press on.”
But there are those moments.
There are a few times in life when you leap up and the past that you’d been standing on falls away behind you, and the future you mean to land on is not yet in place.
Maybe these are life changing moments when one part of your life is at an end and a new life starts tomorrow.
Sometimes you see it coming.
Sometimes you see it was coming when you look back, and you say should have seen that one coming.
Sometimes you might not even know it happened until years later and you say, you know what …
I have long been fascinated by these isolated moments in your life when you are in that moment, suspended, knowing nothing.
As an example, back in the day I played a lot church league softball.
Baptist Church league softball.
If you ever want your faith and testimony challenged play Baptist League softball.
I was challenged a lot and failed a lot.
BUT I DIGRESS.
Every so often I might get a hit and ended up on base and it occurred to me that while on base, time kind of stopped.
The was a finite time that I could be on base.
There was an infinite time that I could be on base.
While on base, my clock stopped.
I couldn’t (well maybe I could have) ask for time out to use the bathroom, answer the phone or respond to any number of calls on my attention.
I was on base.
I was safe.
I was safe on base.
And in softball as well as in baseball, there was no clock running.
No one could point to a clock and say I had been on base too long or that time was running out.
I was on base so long as I was safe.
OR until someone else on my team did something so I could score or get out and maybe the side would go out and I was no longer on base regardless of what I did or said.
It was a magic time.
The past that I’d been standing on fell away behind me, and the future I meant to land on was not yet in place.
Admittedly that ‘on base’ moment is a snapshot of moments where the past that you’d been standing on falls away behind you, and the future you mean to land on is not yet in place.
Sometimes these moments of the time are an elevator ride.
Sometimes these moments stretch on and on where the past that you’d been standing on falls away behind you, and the future you mean to land on is not yet in place.
And for a moment … of maybe a lot longer … you’re suspended, knowing nothing and no one, not even yourself.
Between barstools was the way some folks put it.
And that’s where I am right now.
The past that I have been standing on has fallen away behind me, and the future I mean or I hope to land on is not yet in place.
I am suspended.
Still know things I think but what to think that I should know when the future I might land is not yet in place.
I am reminded of the Steve McQueen role in the movie when he said:
It’s like that fella who fell off a ten-storey building.
What about him?
As he was falling, people on each floor heard him say “So far, so good.”
sweet love remembered such wealth brings that I scorn to change my state with kings
When, in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes, I all alone beweep my outcast state,
And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries, And look upon myself and curse my fate, Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featured like him, like him with friends possessed, Desiring this man’s art and that man’s scope
With what I most enjoy contented least;
Yet … in these thoughts myself almost despising …
Haply … I think on thee,
and then my state,
(Like to the lark at break of day arising from sullen earth)
sings hymns at heaven’s gate;
For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings That then I scorn to change my state with kings.
Sonnet 29 by William Shakespeare (1609).
I know that a sonnet is having 14 lines of iambic pentameter ending in a rhymed couplet and the recitation of such should follow the rhythm of the scan but when I am already editing Mr. Shakespeare down to a haiku, how much more of an offense can it be to try and add parsing in my own fashion (which I stole from a YouTube recitation of the Sonnet 29 by Judi Dench (which I will leave to you to look up on your own)).
BUT I Digress as the point of this is to say in words better than I can write, Happy Anniversary, to my wife!
1989 to 2026, for some better and lots worse, and still together … after all these years!
For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings … That then I scorn to change my state with kings.
to repudiate Yalta, Marshall Plan, ties with UN and NATO
“… the first issues that were going to come up in the Eighty-third Congress would be foreign policy issues, and in foreign policy the dominant Republicans in Congress (and in particular in the Senate, which would, because of its treaty-approving power, be the focus of foreign policy debate) were not Eisenhower’s natural allies but his natural enemies.
It was the support of the eastern, internationalist wing of the party that had given Ike the presidential nomination over Taft, but the Taft wing consisted mostly of Republicans from the Midwest, bedrock of isolationism.
The Ohioan’s midwestern allies — Jenner, Bourke Hickenlooper, Welker, Ferguson, Molly Malone — had yearned for years to dismantle the Roosevelt and Truman policies that the liberals thought were so wonderful.
Now, they felt, their time had come at last.
They would, Johnson was certain, move at once to repudiate Yalta, slash away at the Marshall Plan, and loosen or sever America’s ties with the United Nations and with NATO.
But Eisenhower was not merely a supporter of NATO; he had been commander of NATO.
Says George Reedy, who was down on the ranch with Johnson and was familiar with his thinking, Eisenhower “had actually spent most of… the preceding twenty or thirty years in virtual support of the foreign policies of Roosevelt and of Truman.
The Republicans … under Taft were opposed to that policy, [so] he and the congressional Republicans were just bound to be at loggerheads.”
All the Democrats had to do was “take advantage” of the situation.
Isolationism was back on Capitol Hill, and it was back strong. Journalists who remembered the America First Committee filling the Senate galleries in 1940 and 1941 saw what Richard Rovere called a “resurgent isolationism” in the way the galleries were filled in 1953 when Joe McCarthy was scheduled to speak.
The thunderclap of Pearl Harbor may have demolished in an instant the arguments of the Borahs and Nyes, the thunderclap of Hiroshima may have made it even clearer that in an age of nuclear weapons and modern air forces, the oceans were no longer moats; but those thunderclaps seem to have been heard only faintly in Senate Republican councils, in which the views of quite a sizable bloc (including, of course, the Republican leaders, the defiantly isolationist Taft and the suavely isolationist Bridges) sometimes seemed to resemble the views of the Republican senators who had helped Henry Cabot Lodge Sr. defeat the Treaty of Versailles.
From Master Of The Senate: The Years Of Lyndon Johnson by Robert A. Caro (Random House: New York, 2002).
And of course, Mr. Caro is writing about events in 1952.
The phrase that rang my bell?
Now, they felt, their time had come at last.
I remember a chat in the early 2000’s about George W. Bush and the feller I was chatting with said something along the lines of “We thought we had our guy in there and he is such a disappointment.”
He was one of those fellers who felt the United States had no business, no defined role in any world affair – just stay home and take care of us.
That feller felt, their time had come at last.
They got behind George H.W. Bush.
Now, they felt, their time had come at last.
And H.W. Bush led the coalition of world powers against Saddam Hussein and watch the Soviet Union dissappear.
They got behind Ronald Reagan.
Now, they felt, their time had come at last.
And Reagan led the coalition of world powers to strengthen NATO and call on the Soviets to tear down that wall.
They got behind Richard Nixon.
Now, they felt, their time had come at last.
And Nixon stunned the coalition of world powers by establishing relations with the Peoples Republic of China.
And they got behind Ike.
Now, they felt, their time had come at last.
And, as Mr. Caro writes, “But Eisenhower was not merely a supporter of NATO; he had been commander of NATO … Eisenhower “had actually spent most of… the preceding twenty or thirty years in virtual support of the foreign policies of Roosevelt and of Truman. Eisenhower ‘had actually spent most of… the preceding twenty or thirty years in virtual support of the foreign policies of Roosevelt and of Truman.“”
Prior to Ike were the years of Franklin Roosevelt.
The man who had been on office so, a good part of America thought his first name was President.
The man who was elected President 5 times but the last time he was elected, it was Harry Truman’s name on the ballet.
There is a strong school of political science that feels Truman’s surprise reelection was just that, the 5th time FDR won.
There was a joke that after FDR died, a Republican said to the Democrat … Who are going to vote for now? The Democrat replies, We’ll dig some one up … NO NO PLEASE.
Prior to FDR you have the 12 years of Harding, Coolidge and Hoover that led to that blip in history known as The Great Depression.
Good name though there was nothing great about it.
And before those three guys you have Woodrow Wilson.
When they said, their time had come at the last, they were thinking back to the time when the views of the Republican senators who … helped Henry Cabot Lodge Sr. defeat the Treaty of Versailles.
Defeat the Treaty of Versailles and Woodrow Wilson.
There was no winner in World War 1.
The world at war decided it was time to call it quits, arranged an armistice on Nov. 11th, 1918 and agreed to meet and work out a treaty to settle the game.
President Wilson showed up with 14 points for a peace plan that caused French Prime Minister Georges Clemenceau to famously remark, “Even God only had 10.”
One of those points, which was accepted by other nations involved was the formation of the League of Nations where problems of international importance could be settled and, maybe, future wars avoided.
President Wilson brought the treaty to the United States Senate, the body that had to approve all treaties by a 2/3 vote.
Back then the United States Senate took its role as a part of the Government of The United States seriously.
That and the fact that that 2/3 vote meant that for anything to pass, you had to get votes from both sides.
It came close in a vote several times, but the Republican party controlled the Senate and every effort was made to reject the Treaty of Versailles and the League of Nations.
As a point of trivia, the United States of American and the German Empire did not official end World War 1 until August 21, 1921.
Another point of trivia is that in the election of 1918, the Republican Party won control of the Senate by 1 vote.
Had one seat in 1918 gone Democratic, the vote would have been tied and the Vice President would break the tie giving Democrats control on the Senate and the Senate Foreign Policy Committee.
That year Henry Ford of Ford Motor Company fame and supported of Woodrow Wilson ran for Senate in the State of Michigan.
He entered BOTH the Republican and Democratic Primaries (which was allowed back then) and had he won the primaries he would have be awarded the Senate Seat.
Ford lost the Republican primary and ran as a Democrat and lost the general election by 8,000 votes out of 430,000 votes cast.
Michigan sent Republican Truman Handy Newberry, former Secretary of the Navy to the Senate.
Republican’s organized the Senate by virtue of the 8,000 Michiganders who voted against Henry Ford and the League of Nations was formed without the United States.
The league clearly operated less effectively than it might have. Standing apart from the league also made it easier for the United States to turn inward over the next two decades and to view growing world crises as someone else’s problem. After Pearl Harbor, many Americans concluded that Wilson had been right—fueling support for what became the United Nations.
what if this road, that held no surprises decided not go home after all
at all risks, who wants to know a story’s end or where a road will go
What if this road, that has held no surprises these many years, decided not to go home after all; what if it could turn left or right with no more ado than a kite-tail? What if its tarry skin were like a long, supple bolt of cloth, that is shaken and rolled out, and takes a new shape from the contours beneath? And if it chose to lay itself down in a new way, around a blind corner, across hills you must climb without knowing what’s on the other side, who would not hanker to be going, at all risks? Who wants to know a story’s end, or where a road will go?
What if this road by Sheenagh Pugh, originally published in ‘Ids Hospit’ published by Seren Books (1997).
I was free of all anxieties worries and sorrows that belong
I was free.
I had recovered my liberty.
I belonged to God, not to myself: and to belong to Him is to be free, free of all the anxieties and worries and sorrows that belong to this earth, and the love of the things that are in it.
What was the difference between one place and another, one habit and another, if your life belonged to God, and if you placed yourself completely in His hands?
The only thing that mattered was the fact of the sacrifice, the essential dedication of one’s self, one’s will.
The rest was only accidental.
The Seven Storey Mountain by Thomas Merton (Harcourt, Brace and Company New York, 1948).
Wellllll, sorry, but I do not feel free.
I do not feel that I have recovered my liberty.
See, I have promises to keep.
And miles to go before I sleep.
I feel I could place myself completely in God’s hands, but the bills keep coming.
The rent has to be paid.
I understand that the only things that matters is the sacrifices of life, the essential dedication of one’ self and will.
But it is no accident that the mail keeps bringing those obligations.
But it is no accident that the texts keep bringing those requests.