6.3.2020 – emotional lives

emotional lives
wonderfully intricate
as music of Bach

Jim Harrison writes in his book, Sundog;

People can be truly amazing.

I got this little theory, an utterly unimportant theory, that most people never know more vaguely where they are, either in time or in the scheme of things.

People can’t read contracts or time schedules or identify countries on blank maps.

Why should they?

I don’t know.

There’s a wonderful fraudulence to literacy.

Yet these same people have emotional lives as intricate as that Bach piece.

Arlo Gutherie once said something along the lines of, “We got to remember who we are so when other people stop for a moment and wonder if its possible to get along in this world, we can be doing that for them. In a world that sucks, you don’t have to do very much at all to make a difference in this world. You can do more with just a smile, hold somebody, say hello to somebody.

Sometimes you make a difference just by showing up.

So many of my friends and relatives are turning up these days in unexpected places.

In parks.

In downtowns.

In streets.

It cities.

In towns.

Amazing people doing amazing this things.

5.31.2020 – silence, loudest sound

silence, loudest sound
When look to Presidents for
meaning and comfort

I tried to think of moments in history where people looked to their leaders for words of meaning and comfort.

It is easy to come up with Winston Churchill’s, “Let them do their worst. We shall do out best” and “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat.”

It is also easy to forget Herbert Hoover’s , ““Any lack of confidence in the economic future or the basic strength of business in the United States is foolish,” said in January, 1930.

But silence.

I think of the death of Diana, at one time, the Princess of Wales.

I think of how the people of the Great Britain demanded that the Queen, “SHOW US YOU CARE.”

I very much fell that way today.

Where is the President?

Where is the person I was taught whose number one job was to ‘educate the people.’

This is the only job the entire country votes for.

I don’t want to mess around with the popular vote right now.

I have heard it all.

His opponent won by more votes.

But few Republicans voted in California in 2016.

That is neither here no there for this point.

This feller had the job.

Part of the job is to show their empathy and steadfastness in caring for the lives of average Americans.

As David Gergan said in a CNN Opinion piece, “But we should pause for one more moment to recognize how sad and sharp a departure his silence is from past traditions of the presidency moments of crisis.”

His silence.

Let that word fall on the crowd like a wet blanket.

Silence.

Sometimes silence is the loudest noise of all.

PS – For the ease of everyone I reproduce the David Gergan op ed, “In a sad week for America, Trump has fled from his duty”

This past week has brought tragedy upon tragedy to our nation: the death toll from Covid-19 passed a grim milestone of 100,000 deaths; the brutal killing of George Floyd ignited mass protests in Minneapolis and beyond, and seven people were shot in protests demanding justice in Louisville. But our President was mostly busy with other things: getting into a public fight with Twitter, condemning China over Hong Kong and terminating our relationship with the World Health Organization — an entity that once looked to the United States as the world’s leading institution in fighting pandemics.

President Donald Trump also took time, of course, to send out a stream of new, controversial tweets. He called protesters in Minneapolis “thugs” and repeated a racist line from a Miami police chief years ago, “When the looting starts, the shooting starts.” He even retweeted a video in which a supporter says, “The only good Democrat is a dead Democrat.” But other than a brief tweet in the midst of another storm, Trump remained silent on the most sensitive issue of his presidency: the pandemic that is killing so many older Americans and people of color living near the edge.

Understandably, with the rash of other news, the press is moving on. But we should pause for one more moment to recognize how sad and sharp a departure his silence is from past traditions of the presidency moments of crisis. After George Washington was sworn as commander in chief of the Continental Army, Ethan Allen’s younger brother, Levi, wrote to Washington in 1776 that he had become “Our political Father and head of a Great People.” Shortly thereafter, Washington was frequently referred to as “Father of Our Country.” As he steered us through war, the constitutional
convention, and two terms as President, the phrase caught on. He wasn’t much of a speaker — he thought his deeds spoke for him — but he was a leader of such strong character and rock-solid integrity that he became the gold standard of the presidency.


Lincoln began his presidency during great uncertainty about his leadership. He won the election of 1860 with the smallest plurality ever (39%), and his military experience was virtually nil. But over time, he kindled a special relationship with Union soldiers, many of whom called him “Father
Abraham.” Historians say his homespun ways, common manner and kindly empathy converted them. In his re-election, soldiers were his greatest supporters.


Franklin Roosevelt was known to be self-involved in his early years, but his struggles with polio transformed him into a caring, compassionate leader. Working families and many people of color thought they had a friend in the White House. So attached did his followers become that when he gave a fireside chat on a summer evening, you could walk down the streets of Baltimore and hear every word as families sat in their living room by a radio.


Historians generally agree that Washington, Lincoln and FDR were our greatest presidents. All three are remembered for their empathy and steadfastness in caring for the lives of average Americans. They continue to set the standard.


In contemporary times, it is harder for any president to sustain deep ties with a majority of Americans. We are too sharply divided as a people, and the internet often brings out the worst in us. Even so, several of our recent presidents have found moments when they can unify us and make us feel that at the end of the day, we are indeed one people. In many cases, these moments have come to define their presidencies: Ask any American adult and they can generally remember one, two or even three occasions in which recent presidents connected with us emotionally, stirring our hearts.
I remember with absolute clarity the Challenger disaster in 1986. One saw the plumes of the rising space craft against a bright blue sky — and then that horrific explosion as it instantly disappeared.

Ronald Reagan was one of the few presidents in our history who expressed our emotions so well in
a moment of shock and mourning. For hour upon hour, the networks had replayed the explosion, and it seemed so meaningless. But then Reagan used his speech to replace that picture in our minds with a different one: the astronauts waving goodbye. They became our heroes, especially as Reagan (drawing upon speechwriter Peggy Noonan) closed with lines from a World War II poem: “We will never forget them, nor the last time we saw them, this morning, as they prepared for their journey
and waved goodbye and ‘slipped the surly bonds of earth’ to ‘touch the face of God.'”

One thinks, too, of Bill Clinton traveling to Oklahoma City after the bombing there of a federal building in 1995. Clinton, like Reagan, was at his best when he captured tangled emotions and gave meaning to deaths of some of our finest citizens. He not only consoled families in private but moved the nation when he mourned them publicly. As I recall, that’s when presidents were first called “Mourners in Chief” — a phrase that has been applied repeatedly to presidents since. (Not coincidentally, Clinton’s speech of mourning in Oklahoma City is widely credited with resurrecting his presidency, then in the doldrums.)

One remembers, too, George W. Bush standing on the top of a crushed police car in the rubble of the World Trade Center bombing. When a first responder said he couldn’t hear the President, Bush responded through his bullhorn: “I can hear you. The rest of the world hears you. And the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon.”

One also remembers Barack Obama flying again and again to speak at gravesites where young children or church parishioners were being buried, victims gunned down in a gun-obsessed nation. Thinking about the mass shooting at Emanuel African Methodist Church in Charleston, one’s mind returns to the image of the President of the United States leading a memorial service, singing “Amazing Grace.”


Reagan, Clinton, Bush, Obama — two Republicans, two Democrats — served as our “Mourners in Chief.” All four bound us together for a few moments, and we remembered who we are and who we can be. Why has our current “Mourner in Chief” gone AWOL? God knows. But his flight from responsibility is yet another sadness among this week’s tragic losses.

5.21.2020 – fly above the wind

fly above the wind
fear, hope, burn and freeze like ice.
yet cannot arise

Years ago when I was working at WZZM13 TV in Grand Rapids, the decision was made that the WEB GUY should be in the newsroom where all the action was.

I was where the action was alright.

I was doing web development and design as well and content management sitting under 4 or 5 TV sets and a blaring police scanner radio.

I needed help concentrating.

Something to drown out the buzz.

I discovered online music.

Understand this was BEFORE people began uploading music to YOUTUBE.

But this was when individuals began posting their own music on their own websites.

I discovered some pretty fantastic music on the websites of college choral groups.

To this day I will search out music of this sort and recently came across the YouTube listing for the University College of Dublin Chorale but I digress.

In my searching I came across an artist by the name of Nora York.

A name just recently I learned was a take off on New York.

Her personal website had links to her music and she described the background of her songs.

A couple of songs really hit me and scored my soul.

One titled, “What I want” had the lyrics,

I want what I can’t have, need what I can’t want
Have what I don’t have, what I want
What I can’t have, need what I can’t want
Have what I don’t have, what I want
What I can’t have, need what I can’t want
Have what I don’t have, what I want
What I can’t have, need what I can’t want
Have what I don’t have, what I want
What I can’t have, need what I can’t want
Have but I don’t have

For some reason I could put this song on repeat and listen all day.

It got me through my day in the newsroom and took me to another place.

If I got tired of it, I would switch over to the song, “Another Day”.

The songs were always there online whenever I needed them.

I lost touch with the songs when I moved to Atlanta.

I would think of them from time to time and even play them.

By this time I had downloaded them so I didn’t need to back to the website.

Then I lost the files.

Just recently I thought again about those two songs.

I went searching.

I was expecting what I found.

I was saddened to find out that Nora York died of Pancreatic Cancer in 2016.

I was a little shocked to find out that her passing was recognized by an obit in the New York Times.

“Nora York, Singer Who Fused Forms, Dies at 60

The author of the obit wrote, “Ms. York sang with a supple, polished voice that was by turns mournful, yearning and powerful. She covered or adapted the work of musicians like the Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendrix, Charles Mingus, Joe Simon, Stravinsky, George Gershwin and Fats Waller.”

Turns out Ms York had carved out quite a place in the New York music scene.

I wasn’t the only one but for some reason I thought I was.

I felt good that she had achieved a level of fame.

She had released four albums, none of which picked by a major label.

“Because,” Ms. York said, “no can figure out how to place my music.”

I figured it out.

Or at least I liked it.

I want what I can’t have, need what I can’t want.

Have what I don’t have, what I want.

It was, the music, what I wanted.

It was the music I did not have.

In another version of her song, “What I want” she prefaced it with a few lines from a sonnet by Thomas Wyatt, I Find No Peace written around 1540.

I find no peace, and all my war is done.
I fear and hope. I burn and freeze like ice.
I fly above the wind, yet can I not arise;
And nought I have, and all the world I season.
That loseth nor locketh holdeth me in prison
And holdeth me not—yet can I scape no wise—
Nor letteth me live nor die at my device,
And yet of death it giveth me occasion.
Without eyen I see, and without tongue I plain.
I desire to perish, and yet I ask health.
I love another, and thus I hate myself.
I feed me in sorrow and laugh in all my pain;
Likewise displeaseth me both life and death,
And my delight is causer of this strife.

Even from beyond the grave, Nora York reached out with something new to me that was 500 years old.

I it was what I wanted.

It was what I didn’t have.

Found peace.

My wars, for a time, were over.

How these things work out is beyond me.

Here is the version of What I Want that I listened to.

5.19.2020 – government prone to

government prone to
sustained bouts of stupidity
is news to nobody

Right is right, and wrong is wrong, and a body ain’t got no business doing wrong when he ain’t ignorant and knows better.

So says that great American, Tom Sawyer in the book, Huckleberry Finn.

Gets to the final sum pretty quick.

Right is right.

Wrong is wrong.

When people are out of money, food, work and hope, well that is wrong.

Does any one disagree?

Then we should do right.

We should do the right thing.

We should do the opposite of wrong.

We got to get money, food, work and hope to those people.

So we look to Congress.

Alexander Hamilton wrote in the Federalist (#52) when he was explaining the Constitution to America, “It is it is essential to liberty that the government in general should have a common interest with the people, so it is particularly essential that the branch of it under consideration should have an immediate dependence on, and an intimate sympathy with, the people.”

Big words.

Good words.

Essential words.

It is essential to Liberty …

It is particularly essential …

That the branch [House of Representatives] should have an immediate dependence on, and an intimate sympathy with the people.

Sympathy.

There is a word not often used in the same sentence as the word, Congress.

And why?

Mr. Twain also wrote, “Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”

I can picture Mr. Hamilton today saying, ‘Something went wrong here.”

5.17.2020 – my view through my lens

my view through my lens
my assumption what I see
same through your lens, but …

I remember a story in a book on photography.

The author, who I cannot recall, described a scene at a park where he was walking with a friend.

The were some distance behind another feller who had a camera.

This feller would stop and stare and now and then, move around in one spot, and take a photo.

Then the feller would move on.

Our author and his friend would arrive at the same spot and they would stop.

The author’s friend would look.

And look and look.

And say, “What did that feller see here? I don’t see anything. What was he taking a picture of?”

In the 1981 film, Ansel Adams, photographer, Mr. Adams describes what went into the photograph Moonrise, Hernandez, New Mexico.


I feel the most important of the story is Mr. Adams saying, “I observed a fantastic scene.”

From the get-go he recognized that what he was looking at was special and that a special photograph just might capture the scene.

Mr. Adams has written about this moment and the upheaval as he pulled over and starting setting up his camera.

You have to love the part where he cannot find his light meter but remembered that moonlight was 250 candles per square foot.

He writes that he got all set and snapped the photo and “I knew it was special when I released the shutter.”

Would I have recognized the scene?

I would not have remembered the luminosity of the moon in foot candles.

Would I have had the same view in my lens?

Doubt it.

As I walk though my day today I will see many things.

But I will make the assumption that what I see and the way I see it is the way every one sees it.

Coronavirus.

Stay at home.

Wear a mask.

President Trump.

Governors.

Sentators.

They way I see these things is the way everyone sees them.

Right?

Obviously not.

The views are different and all over the place.

A short walk down the information super highway with a crowd from social media should convince me of that.

Though, I still have to stop at the same spots and I have to ask.

What did those people who come away with different views see here?

What do you see here?