is an offensive
crime mathematically
and ethically

Hey, I am not writing about the current administration!

Boy Howdy, but yes, talking about something that may be a crime and I am talking about … sports.

Today’s haiku is adapted from the wonderful word rhythm in the sentence from the Sports Illustrated article, March Madness Is Likely to Expand Because of a Cash-and-Power Grab by Pat Forde where Mr. Forde writes:

This potential crime against sporting art is offensive mathematically, geometrically, intellectually and I daresay ethically.

When I was a kid and I first heard the song 76 Trombones in the musical Music Man, I imagined great phalanxes of marching trombone players followed by another block of 110 cornet players followed by rows and rows of the finest virtuosos.

I could see those powerful, majestic rows and rows of marchers in my head.

In the same way, I got that feeling of power marching forward as I read those majestic polysyllable words marching across the screen of my tablet.

Mathematically.

BAM

Geometrically.

BAM

Intellectually.

BAM

Ethically.

BAM

I am reminded of the scene in the movie Anatomy of a Murder where the Prosecutor yells, “Objection! His testimony is incompetent (bangs his hand on the table), hearsay (bangs his hand on the table), irrelevant (bangs his hand on the table), immaterial (bangs his hand on the table), inconclusive (bangs his hand on the table) …”

And Jimmy Stewart, the Defense Attorney, replies … “That’s too much for me. The witness is yours.”

What was funny is that they all fit into Mr. Forde’s argument.

Adding more teams to March Madness was wrong …

Mathematically – The number of teams did not work out so that every team played the same number of games.

Geometrically – 64 teams was the limit of the number of teams that could fit on a bracket THAT COULD BE PRINTED on a single piece of 11.5 by 8.5 paper (could there be a better reason).

Intellectually – It was an affront that the tournament needed fixing.

Ethically – the changes are suggested for all the wrong reasons of making money and displaying power rather than a move toward fairness on behalf of excluded teams.

Mr. Forde also writes that the planned expansion of the NCAA March Madness Tournament means that the powers-that-be in College Sports are standing in front of the Mona Lisa right now, ready to deface their masterpiece a little more.

Does that mean that a little bit of paint on the Mona Lisa would be acceptable?

we’ll forget, but now
absence feels like a loss – game, set
match to the gizmos

It’s the perfect Wimbledon. The sun is out, the Brits are firing and as for the scoring, that too will be somewhat perfect, this being the first Wimbledon since the tournament told the line judges, long the arbiters of accuracy, that after 148 years, their services will no longer be required.

Arguments, unpredictability and, as the cameras zoom in to the line judge whose eyesight judgment prompts a participant explosion, buttock-clenching awkwardness in close-up: goodbye to all that. Hello, AI and sharp-eyed robots, analysing in real time 18 lots of footage.

It’s perfect now, but is it progress? After the first day, players complained that while the calls were perfect in their accuracy, they were imperfect in that the gizmo’s volume was set too low and they could not hear the verdicts.

To some extent, Wimbledon is falling into line – both the Australian and US Opens, and very many of the lesser professional tournaments, have waved goodbye to the humans and embraced electronic line calling. The players wanted it. They strive truly, madly and deeply for perfection; their short, explosive careers cannot hinge on the human fallibility of others.

But look at Centre Court without the sentries posted around the border, and without the quiet ceremony that has always marked the departure of one set of line judges and the arrival of another. One day their absence will feel natural and maybe we’ll forget they were ever there, barking their assessments. But for now, their absence feels like a loss. Game, set and match to the gizmos.

From the article, Look at Wimbledon without human line judges and tell me this: do you really want life to be perfect? by Hugh Muir.

Major League umpire, Bill Klem famously said about making the call in baseball games that, I never missed one … in my heart.

Past University of Michigan Football Coach, Bo Schembechler once said something along the lines that his game plan always took into account 7 points that could go either way because of the calls by the referees … it’s part of the game, he said.

I like to follow Cricket when I can.

I follow Team England.

In Cricket the difference between an being called OUT can depend on whether of not the ball hit the player or his uniform or if the ball hit the bat.

To make sure the correct call is made, Cricket uses HOT SPOT and THE WHISTLER.

The HOTSPOT is an infrared camera on the play because the HEAT SIGNITURE of a ball hitting wood (the wicket) is different than that of the ball hitting the cloth of the uniform of the batter.

If that doesn’t work, there is the WHISTLER that is a microphone under the plate because the SOUND SIGNITURE of the ball hitting wood is different from the sound of the ball hitting cloth.

Oh give me a break.

But sports are a billon dollar industry.

Betting on sports is a billion dollar industry.

To quote General Jack Ripper in the movie, Dr. Stangelove, Clemenceau once said that war is too important to be left to the generals.

Well, today, in or out, in bounds or out of bounds, before the horn or after the buzzer or what have you is too important to be left to humans.

I guess.

I understand that athletes strive truly, madly and deeply for perfection; their short, explosive careers cannot hinge on the human fallibility of others.

I don’t know.

It used to be part of the game.

It used to be … a game.

One day the absence of humans will feel natural and maybe we’ll forget they were ever there, barking their assessments.

But for now, their absence feels like a loss.

yourself on the line
have to risk feeling this way
to get the reverse

“If you’re willing to lift the big championships, you’ve to put yourself on the line. You have to risk feeling this way to get the reverse.”

If you can’t be a great winner, you can still be a good loser.

Golfer Justin Rose as quoted in the article, Grace of Masters nearly man Justin Rose enhanced McIlroy’s historic win by Andy Bull,

Grace?

Grace under pressure?

Sportsmanship?

Why do these concepts all seem such a novelty in the culture of today’s news cycle?

want to know what the
secret to good coaching is?
get good players …. hmmmmmmmmmmm

Adapted from the article, Super Bowl 59 winners and losers: Eagles come together as Chiefs fall apart, by Michael Middlehurst-Schwartz of USA TODAY where Mr. Middlehurst-Schwartz writes:

“You want to know what the secret to good coaching is?” Sirianni asked on NFL Network’s postgame show. “Get good players.” Roseman [Philadelphia Eagles GM] has unquestionably done that and then some. After Philadelphia flamed out in spectacular fashion to end last season, the architect of the roster embarked on what will be remembered as one of the most aggressive and transformative offseasons in league history. He netted massive returns on free-agent contracts both big (2,000-yard rusher Saquon Barkley) and small (NFL Defensive Player of the Year finalist Zack Baun), and a draft class highlighted by Quinyon Mitchell and Cooper DeJean took the secondary from a weak point to a source of strength. Recall what A.J. Brown said on Opening Night: “I think Howie Roseman is the reason we are here tonight.”

I am reminded of a college game years ago when a feller named Keith Jackson was the play caller for ABC Sports and after some stellar play, Mr. Jackson quietly said … “It’s the players … not the plays.”

On the other hand, the line, ‘… get good players” reminds me of comedian Steve Martin’s bit, “You can make a Million Dollars … and not pay any income tax.”

Made it sound so easy.

Especially as the instructions started, “First … Make a million dollars .. then … “

Secret to good coaching?

Just get good players.

(Haiku question – how many syllables in hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm)