is an offensive
crime mathematically
and ethically
Hey, I am not writing about the current administration!
Boy Howdy, but yes, talking about something that may be a crime and I am talking about … sports.
Today’s haiku is adapted from the wonderful word rhythm in the sentence from the Sports Illustrated article, March Madness Is Likely to Expand Because of a Cash-and-Power Grab by Pat Forde where Mr. Forde writes:
This potential crime against sporting art is offensive mathematically, geometrically, intellectually and I daresay ethically.
When I was a kid and I first heard the song 76 Trombones in the musical Music Man, I imagined great phalanxes of marching trombone players followed by another block of 110 cornet players followed by rows and rows of the finest virtuosos.
I could see those powerful, majestic rows and rows of marchers in my head.
In the same way, I got that feeling of power marching forward as I read those majestic polysyllable words marching across the screen of my tablet.
Mathematically.
BAM
Geometrically.
BAM
Intellectually.
BAM
Ethically.
BAM
I am reminded of the scene in the movie Anatomy of a Murder where the Prosecutor yells, “Objection! His testimony is incompetent (bangs his hand on the table), hearsay (bangs his hand on the table), irrelevant (bangs his hand on the table), immaterial (bangs his hand on the table), inconclusive (bangs his hand on the table) …”
And Jimmy Stewart, the Defense Attorney, replies … “That’s too much for me. The witness is yours.”
What was funny is that they all fit into Mr. Forde’s argument.
Adding more teams to March Madness was wrong …
Mathematically – The number of teams did not work out so that every team played the same number of games.
Geometrically – 64 teams was the limit of the number of teams that could fit on a bracket THAT COULD BE PRINTED on a single piece of 11.5 by 8.5 paper (could there be a better reason).
Intellectually – It was an affront that the tournament needed fixing.
Ethically – the changes are suggested for all the wrong reasons of making money and displaying power rather than a move toward fairness on behalf of excluded teams.
Mr. Forde also writes that the planned expansion of the NCAA March Madness Tournament means that the powers-that-be in College Sports are standing in front of the Mona Lisa right now, ready to deface their masterpiece a little more.
Does that mean that a little bit of paint on the Mona Lisa would be acceptable?
No Haiku For You 