confidence of
ignorant youth seeps away
nothing takes its place
I felt thoroughly grown-up at twenty-one — more grown-up, indeed, than I have ever succeeded in feeling since. The confidence of ignorant youth seeps slowly, slowly away and to our astonishment no confidence of sapient age comes surging in to take its place.
From Here at the New Yorker by Brendan Gill, New York : Random House, 1975.
As Mark Twain is credited with saying “…when I was seventeen, I could hardly stand it to be with my father because he was was so ignorant, and at twenty I noticed that now and then, my father said a sensible thing, but at twenty-five I was simply amazed to discover how my father had improved in the last eight years.”
Sad to mention that according to the Quote Investigator, “… the earliest known attribution to Twain occurs in 1915 and this is rather late because Twain died in 1910. To date, the saying has not been found in Twain’s writings, notebooks, or letters. Quotation experts and Twain scholars are skeptical of the attribution to Twain.”
Me at 21?
Back in 1981?
Just accepted to continue my studies at an institution of higher learning, I doubted there was anything left for me to learn.
My first lecture, I was seated at a long table in a room that looked out a window through the iconic columns of the landmark building on the campus of this institution.
The bell in the bell tower central to central campus was striking the hour.
I had arrived.
15 minutes into my first lecture with 4 pages of notes, my confidence started to leak out all over the floor of the room.
I was comforted by the looks on the faces on the other students, that they too, were feeling it.
Then a goofy thing happened.
Without raising their hand or waiting to be recognized, the student next to me called out to the Professor, “You really think that?”
The Professor paused and then started a 5 minute dialogue with the student and while the student did give in, the student was not at all convinced and the Professor picked up where he left off.
This was something new to me.
What had I got myself into?
Argue with a Professor?
Maybe even BE EXPECTED to argue with a Professor?
I am not sure how I resolved all my thoughts – most likely I just doubled my note taking speed.
I knew I had to get through this first lecture because being Mr. KNOW-IT-ALL, I had set up my class schedule like I was in high school.
I had three more lectures back to back to back that first morning.
And I was 21.
All grown up.
More grown-up!
More grown-up, indeed, than I have ever succeeded in feeling since.
And you know what?
The confidence of ignorant youth seeps slowly, slowly away and to our astonishment no confidence of sapient age comes surging in to take its place.
No Haiku For You 