1.11.2020 – Robert Paul Hoffman

Robert Paul Hoffman
Died thirty two years ago
miss him every day

My Dad and I have a special bond.

Really.

A physical, special bond.

On Thanksgiving Day, 1969, while goofing around in the basement with my brothers, I slipped and fell.

My brother Timmy had been chasing me and since he was on my back as I fell, I really picked up speed.

As I fell, I was yelling, mouth wide open.

Point of contact with the linoleum covered concrete floor was my left front tooth, which snapped in half.

I remember my Mom groaning, ‘Not the front tooth.”

Dad was a Dentist.

Our journey together over my tooth began.

The joke told was that Dad wanted to wait until I matured to put a cap on the tooth.

He finally gave up waiting and put a cap on it anyway.

Not sure how old I was but it was on a Saturday morning (for a long time, Dad worked half days on Saturday to treat those folks who could not take time off of work to see their Dentist) and he told my sister Janet to bring me down to the office.

I was about 10 or 11 but not sure.

The plan was for a gold crown cap which required that the stump of my left tooth be ground down to make room for the cap.

I had no idea what was coming.

I got no laughing gas or novocaine.

I sat in the operating chair.

Dad leaned in with the grinder making that whooooop whooooooop sound as he reved it up.

The grinder made contact with my tooth and I screamed.

Dad didn’t stop.

I didn’t stop.

Dad stepped back and hangs up the tool, says “This is ridiculous. We will just leave it.”

He stomped out the operating room.

I looked at Janet who had stayed to watch.

In my mind her eyes were as big as pie plates.

I said, ‘I’ll stop.”

Dad came back in and went to work.

I gripped the arms of that chair like a I was drowning.

It seems to me like this went on for hours.

In later discussion, Dad decided that the tooth was broken off so close to the nerve that it hurt more than he thought it might.

Since he had to grind some of my other teeth to make room for the cap and that was nothing like working on the stump, I agreed.

There were more trips to the office.

Impressions.

Fittings.

Final installation of the cap.

I got to see Dad sculpt a gold crown cap in wax and then create a plaster mold of the cap.

I watched as he used a blow torch and a manual centrifuge to melt dental gold and spin it to force the gold into the mold by gravity to create the cap.

He really was an unsung artist of this craft.

Over the next years I broke the cap the off several times.

Each time meant return trips to the office for repairs.

In 1978, my Mom demanded a cap that would last for my Senior Class Photographs for Graduation from Grand Rapids Creston High School.

One last time it was back to the office.

This last cap was just a little larger to insure a tight fit.

With this cap resting in place, Dad says, “just hold it” and fumbled in the equipment drawer for a hammer.

After a few blows that left me groggy, the cap was in place.

It has been there ever since.

I feel it with my tongue all the time.

Sometimes I don’t notice it.

Sometimes I do, and I think of Dad.

Happy to report that our relationship got past the time in the chair.

When he died, I felt he was my best friend.

The tooth is still here.

I didn’t know a gold front tooth was a fashion statement until I moved to Georgia, (Hey call me Earl!)

A special bond.

One last note, I haven’t been to a Dentist since he died.

1.10.2020 – just the memory

just the memory
of my wife’s smile, hug, and kiss
make moment better

So sweet, right?

So romantic.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.

We have been married for over 30 years.

There have been high points.

There have been low points.

There have been low low points.

We drive each nuts a lot of the time.

When two people have the same opinion, one of them is not necessary.

In my mind that quote is attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt but I can’t find the actual quote in The Google.

My wife and I rarely have the same opinion.

(If we do, we suspect the other of changing their mind for the moment.)

For us, we are necessary to each other.

A perfect match.

We are growing old together.

Some of the edges are coming off.

Some getting sharper.

Good days.

Bad days.

Good moments.

Bad moments.

Memories of the good days and good moments.

Smiles.

Hugs.

Kisses.

Just in my memory, make my day better.

A perfect match.

1.9.2020 – swinging on a star

swinging on a star
take moon beams home in a jar
moonlit morning hopes

The Google says that the Moon today is in a Waxing Gibbous phase. This phase is when the moon is more than 50% illuminated but not yet a Full Moon. The phase lasts round 7 days with the moon becoming more illuminated each day until the Full Moon.

It was cold and clear last night when my wife and I went for walk.

Cold for Georgia anyway.

Clear and lit by the Waxing Gibbous Moon.

Moonlight was strong enough that we cast shadows and the old song about catching moonbeams in a jar stuck in my brain.

Innocent and sweet thoughts to end the day.

When I left for work this morning that Waxing Gibbous Moon was still shining.

It was low enough in the trees that I could have, like the Court Jester in Thurber’s Many Moons, climbed up in a tree and grabbed the moon for the Princess to wear on a chain around her neck.

(When the Moon shows up the next night, the King worries that his daughter will notice. The Court Jester suggests asking the Princess how that happened when she has the Moon on a chain around her neck. The Princess replies “That is easy, silly,” she said. “When I lose a tooth, a new one grows in its place, doesn’t it?”)

Mr. Debussy’s prélude, La fille aux cheveux de lin (otherwise known as The Girl With The Flaxen Hair) was playing on the radio.

Where does this music come from?

A bad mood and crummy attitude that has been percolating inside me this week didn’t have a chance.

Like the Court Jester, I winked at the moon, “for it seemed to the Court Jester that the moon had winked at him.”

The moment may not last long.

I am, after all, on my way to work.

For now.

For a few minutes.

For a wink of an eye.

I am swinging on a star.

1.8.2020 – work of the past year

work of the past year
the strangers who became friends
study wind and waves

Entirely random thoughts as I try to make sense of a day that by 9AM had me ready to chuck 20 years experience in the bin and go on with life.

Surfing the ‘net, I came across a story about the difficulty of taking great photos of … surfers!

Beat that!

The choice of words and the passion that came through the words stuck a note.

The author writes, “These are planned shots that we all see in our heads but take tons of luck and cooperation by nature to work. When they do, it’s the best feeling ever!”

The best feeling ever.

I used to have that at work a lot.

Of late I feel like I am running when a brick wall drops in front of me and forces me to another direction.

Then another wall drops.

Another direction.

Another wall.

Another direction.

The area around me decreases.

Running out of directions to turn.

Running out of room.

Out of room?

Sometimes you hear word combinations that you like.

Sometimes you hear word combinations that hit your brain like a brick.

Study wind and waves.

Study wind and waves?

SIGN UP ME UP!

Here is the bit of text with the story The magic of the perfect surf photo

The three critical elements to surf photography are good light, good surfers and good waves. Most of us photographers get up early to take advantage of all three. Because the ocean is a fickle environment, our window to capture these moments may only come once a month. We study wind and wave charts like meteorologists. We factor in family and jobs, dropping responsibilities more than we should when conditions are right.

When all the elements align, when you’ve made it out there, swum in a turbulent ocean for hours and got home to see an incredible photo, your stoke is off the charts.

The surfers are often strangers who become friends, names and numbers exchanged, meetups discussed and planned shoots coordinated. The photos below, by several photographers, were selected for such a meetup – an evening in southern California last November with several surf photographers to share work of the past year

Josh Robusto in San Diego in https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/gallery/2020/jan/01/surf-photography-california-waves

1.7.2020 – one little corner

one little corner
vegetating one’s lifetime
put down that iPhone
!

Mr. Twain said, “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.”

Flip this and not traveling, content to vegetate in one little corner, is a green house garden of prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.

Content to vegetate in one little corner.

Sounds like a fate worse than death.

Unless I am connected.

Connected in such a way that I no longer notice that I am vegetating in a corner.

Hard to see what is going on.

Hard to notice what is happening around me.

Hard to care.

If I am looking straight down at my hand the whole day.